10 Things I Hate About Trump

I think we can all agree that the joke that is Donald Trump has gone too far, so I have compiled a comprehensive list of all of his worst qualities. So: ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, and my non-binary friends, in no particular order, here is our ‘Top Trumps’ of Trump.

1. The Misogyny – type ‘Donald Trump misogyny’ into Google and you find 681,000 results. He’s called women slobs, pigs, fat and disgusting animals… need I say more? See here for a more detailed list of all the charming things this real life man, who is running for president (!) has said about women.

2. The Racism – Not only has his company been sued not once but TWICE for refusing to rent to black people, but he has also refused to denounce white supremacists who have endorsed him. Oh and once he said he has a ‘great relationship with the blacks’… because that’s totally fine and sane?

3. The Islamophobia – This is separate to racism because I think I need to point out how terrible it is in its own right. I mean, having a man like that leading one of the most powerful countries in the world when extremism is such a sensitive area? Oh yeah, great idea, let’s all get on the Trump train with the likes of the KKK.

4. Comments about wanting to have sex with his daughter – :/

5. His hair – Trump has a habit of randomly attacking literally anyone for anything… especially their looks. People in glass houses, eh Don? Considering he looks like a Toby jug in a cheap wig, he certainly can’t talk.

6. His terrible foreign policy – ‘Ban all the Muslims!’ ‘Build a wall around Mexico!’ He is the embodiment of ignorance. And no, immigration is not the solid foundation for an entire election campaign (I’m looking at you, Farage). It’s impossible to so much as contemplate a man like that wielding any actual power with ideas like that. It would be like allowing a character from a racist animation in the 50s to be the next Prime Minister: no one in their right mind would let that happen.

7. Lack of a clear stance on anything – I’ve not known someone attempt to hit so many bases without having a clear stance on anything other than racism since… oh right, Hitler. That’s where I’ve seen that.

8. His arrogance – He literally pretended to be someone else and bragged about how irresistible he is to women. Those are not the actions of someone in their right mind.

9. His campaign techniques – He has been so cheap and below the belt it’s absurd. He does not belong among reasonable adults. That is without a doubt.

10. Everything about him and what he stands for – let us pray for all the sensible citizens of the USA and hope they don’t end up with a racist Toby jug oligarch for their next president.

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The eagle agitator strikes again!