Ham-fisted and awfully written, this video-game adaption leaves much to be desired.

We follow the story of Callum Lynch, a man sentenced to die, only to be brought back into the world of the living by Abstergo, the front for the Templars. Ancient enemies, the Templars and Assassins have fought for centuries over something called the Apple of Eden.

Said to hold the seed to man’s first disobedience, this seed grants the user power over free will.

They use something called the Animus to go through ‘genetic-memories’ of an Assassin, to find this powerful object. Which is totally impossible but okay.

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What I can’t understand is how such a simple premise can be so confusingly and gracelessly shoved into the audience’s face. The premise that “violence is a disease” seems to be the Templar’s goal, wanting to eradicate all free-will, in exchange for unquestionable obedience, using the Apple.

But the way it presents this idea is so unbelievably bad. There’s no subtlety. From the offset, they are looking for the Apple. In the game, you spend hours just doing assassinations, and are slowly given the truth. It makes sense in a game form, because you lead into this tale of deceit and death.

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The movie felt poorly paced, and you didn’t really see any of the characters go through any kind of progression. Cal (played by Michael Fassbender), is the most boring of protagonists, and a lot of his decisions don’t make sense.

When he finds his father in the same facility as him, he goes to kill him, but after a brief conversation he does a total turn around. Literally, after his father explains Cal’s mother asked to be killed, as they needed to wipe out the bloodline. This meant that the Templars could not use the Assassin’s memories to learn of the Apple’s location.

It feels empty. The climax of the film is more underwhelming than the end of AC III, and just generally feels unfinished. Plus, new drinking game: take a swig whenever they use the eagle motif.

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The Animus sections are the only saving grace. Very faithfully done in the style of the game, rooftop fights, free-running, the whole whack. But again, it’s unfortunate that the story is too weak for these parts to actually stand up on.

When it was revealed the present would take more of a hold in the film, people were sceptical. And we can see why.

A real shame.

2/5*