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Shooting Yourself in the… Erm

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5 July 2017

By Alex Khalil

I had far too many inappropriate titles; I picked the tamest.

Early Friday morning, in Jacksonville Florida, a 38-year-old man named Cedrick Jelks reportedly shot himself in the one place you really don’t want to be shot.

Accidentally.

He sat in his Nissan Altima, and on a loaded handgun.

He was then taken to Memorial Hospital by Shanekia Roberts, who lived nearby in Freedom Crossing Trail. He apparently entered her home in a distressed state and went right to the bathroom, presumably to check the damage.

After following him, she saw how bad the wound was, then rushed him to the hospital.

Safe to say, the bullet went where the Sun doesn’t shine.

Poor sod.

He has gone into surgery, but to add salt to the wound so to speak, it was discovered he had been convicted of drugs possession in 2004, which means he is currently facing charges on the grounds of him possessing a firearm.

Really jumped the gun on this one.

Or sat on it. I don’t know.

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