Should Auld Acquaintance be Forgot?

18 September 2014

By Yasmine

Is it time for Scotland to say goodbye? It’s all down to the Scots today and what they say, goes. David Cameron, Nick ‘The Sidekick’ Clegg and Ed Miliband have done their all to make the Scottish people vote no; but have they been persuaded?

Well first off, David’s opening speech to the Scots should have been more truthful and should have sounded a bit more like this: “Hi, I’m David, I’m a multi-millionaire tax avoiding cheat and I’m here to tell you to vote no because I believe that sick people are criminals, single parents are work shy, the unemployed are to blame for their poverty and the ordinary workers are to blame for our double-dip recession. Any questions?”

Mr Cameron knows that he and his forehead will be leaving 10 Downing Street when he gets voted out next year and he’s upset about Scotland leaving because he thinks making them stay will save his bacon for the next election. At least Scotland have the common sense to run whereas the rest of the country are stuck with the failing government.

Alex Salmond on the other hand, only backs up his theories by dwelling on battles that happened seven centuries ago. If Scotland was to become independent Alex would make sure the movie, Braveheart, was showing 24 hours a day, seven days a week to reassure his fellow Scots that he made the right decision.

James VI of Scotland did not make us whole again to then be ripped apart by Salmond. James united England and Scotland and no one batted an eye lid but 300 years later, David Cameron tries to block internet porn in the UK, then Alex Salmond loses his mind.

To be honest, how will the Scots actually decide? They have a choice between David Cameron screwing up the entire country or Alex Salmond screwing up Scotland all on his own.

If only there was a plan C…


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