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Tories Try To Bribe The Young With Chicken

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25 May 2018

By Bronwen

It’s no secret that the Conservative Party has real issues recruiting young people and enticing younger voters. In the last general election, nearly two thirds of under 30s voted for Labour compared to only 22% who voted Conservative.

It’s unsurprising why so many young people vote Labour. Left-wing and Labour Party activists dominate social media sites and young Tories receive endless online abuse. The Tories are well aware that young people don’t want to associate themselves with the party, even if they secretly support it. The Labour Party has 552,000 members compared to only 124,000 Conservative Party members.

In an attempt to entice younger members, the Tories have looked into offering new members discount cards that would give holders money off high street brands which they hoped would include Nando’s. As you’d expect, the piri piri chicken restaurant was quick to decline the Conservative Party’s offer, stating that it has no political affiliations.

The idea for a discount card came after Theresa May’s former advisor Will Tanner warned that the young will not lean towards Conservatism as they get older as previous generations have done. “If we don’t we will forfeit our political relevance and be finished for at least a generation” he predicted.
In a final blow to the Tories, a spokesman for Nando’s released this statement:
“We have a Nando’s loyalty card and standard gift cards that anyone can use, and we offer a 20% discount to Police, Fire Services, Ambulance service and NHS staff.”

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