Witty Wednesday

5 November 2014

By Yasmine

Yes! It’s bonfire night and what better way to celebrate than to stand outside in freezing temperatures and watch a pile of rubble burn. So to lighten the mood, here’s a guide on who to avoid if you are going to an organised firework event:

  • The Chavs: These wannabe regal creatures will be huddled together trying to touch each other with lit sparklers. *Warning* they may also have a three litre bottle of cheap cider or two to keep them company.


  • Kids: They are like something possessed. Hyper one minute and shaking and crying the next. If you didn’t get earplugs to block out the banging noise, you will certainly need them to block out the crying from all the little stuck up kids sulking because they can’t have a hot dog after stuffing their faces with candyfloss, sweets and every other delicacy available at the side of the fire .


  • The “get a room” couple. Yes, it’s romantic to stand hand in hand with your soul mate whilst watching the fireworks but no one wants to see Bonnie and Clyde playing tonsil tennis whilst us singletons only have a scarf and a burger to cuddle up to.

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