#YEAR13PROBLEMS

People can change

In the news recently – be it politics or Hollywood – there have been numerous accusations of sexual harassment and assault. It seems the people who always seem squeaky clean in the public eye are quite the opposite behind closed doors.

Interestingly, though, these accusations of assault have prompted one man, in particular, to seek “evaluation and treatment” after several men came forward to say he sexually assaulted them. That man is Kevin Spacey, star of House of Cards and American Beauty.

He has raised an issue that causes so much controversy writing this column was something I almost didn’t do. But that’s what this column is for: the issues that aren’t always the easiest to talk about.

Kevin Spacey seeking treatment has brought up the issue of people changing. And not just changing from small, annoying habits to being ‘normal’, but someone going from a completely horrible, terrifying predator to someone ‘normal’ (AKA someone who doesn’t abuse their power and position).

While it is impossible to tell whether or not Spacey himself will change for the better, many others can and do. Oftentimes, those who abuse have been abused. And oftentimes, those who have been abused never abuse. However, those who have been abused and make that choice to abuse others have a lot going on psychologically. Now that is absolutely no excuse for what they have done. Not at all. What it shows is the psychological explanation.

Someone who has been abused and abuses will need to deal with the issues rooted in their past. Issues that they have not adequately dealt with can be all of the years later and, although it would take months – even years – to reach a place where they can say they are recovered, it works.

Those who abuse of course must be punished because what they have done is wrong and sickening. Yet in order for them to truly move on and be a functioning member of society once the sentence is up and thus prevent re-offending, they must be able to change their ways. Through therapy, examination and analysis that can often be brutal and draining, causing those who have inflicted pain to feel it just as intensely themselves, people can change.

It is possible for someone who has committed such unthinkable horrors to become better – but only if they truly want to.

There are no excuses for sexual assault and harassment. And those who commit such acts and have access to the kind of treatment that can change their ways have no excuse for not taking it and using it wisely.

People can change. It’s not easy, but it’s possible. And as society progresses and we focus on services like therapy, for example, it will (and should) become more common for those who have done wrong to be treated to make them right again.